the boring leading the bored

Wednesday, July 16, 2003
i think these posts need titles

gotta love being one of those types who loves to ramble. so here i go.

chilled with alle today. we had good fun, the guy at subway gave us extra cookies for free. im not sure why, but my guesses are 1)he was friendly 2)he was high 3)he thought we were cuuuute. we hung out all day and went to dinner, where we talked about youth group stuff. i think that, at least temporarily, im shifting my life a lot more towards that place. and i dont know how temporary it will be... *note: i still love all the rest of you, i swear*

something interesting i just saw: "bitterness is not wisdom" <-- good point

today i thought about that time i lost myself. come to think of it, i think about that almost every day. and to think i thought i had found myself at the time. or was in the process of doing so, anyway. im glad i actually did find myself again. i dont think i had a choice... i would have either done what i did or eventually died of misery. because i didnt belong where i was anymore. and yet at the time i didnt belong where i am now. but where i am now was fortunately willing to take me back. which is, naturally, rather unsurprising, as this place is always welcoming. and at any level where it isnt welcoming, the lower ones of course, it is now becoming my job to correct that, to be the welcome. so if you're lost when you thought you were finally finding something, dont be afraid to come to this place, where i am now, because its rather nice and its the best thing that ever happened to me. i hope i wont let you down and make it unwelcoming, but a certain somebody will always make it welcoming. gosh im glad im here in this place where i found myself. its good. it may be scary sometimes, or hard. but it's good. see if you can say that about anywhere else. i cant.

boy, how times change... how lives move and shape. we weave in and out of each other's lives. and it all just seems so out of control... and yet control is held, but not by us. God has our lives in his hands, and he makes living such a miracle. mine's a miracle, anyway.

sometimes late at night like this i get like this... im not sorry. im just sorry that i cant have more peace and realization more often.

music: julian lennon, "You dont have to tell me"


Live wires:
Post a Comment